My medication management provider, a psychiatric nurse practitioner, just asked me a question. She does not know what made her think of it.
The question?
If Wolf and I were not together, would each of us be living in the truck, or, would we be elsewhere?
Whoa. Wow. Hm. Um.
Wolf, possibly. Probably, couch surfing also. He and I talked about the question.
As for me, the truth is, Diary, I likely would have ended up in an institution. A psychiatric hospital or institution. From there, I have no idea.
Somehow, this question bothers me. Or, for a yet identified reason, it bothers me.
I will ponder this. Eventually, something will arise.
Here is what I do know.
- She did not ask with malice.
- We have spoken about codependency, and ours (Wolf and I).
- She was honest, she did not know what made her think of it.
What if ….
we are not sure of her meaning? Is she referring to – if we had broken up since becoming homeless/homeseeking? Or, is she referring to if we had not made it to homelessness? Or …?
Oh, well. Two weeks before I speak to her again. (Usually it is only once a month; however, we added a medication to help me quit smoking, so back to every two weeks for a bit.)
This will annoy me until then. I can feel it.
How long? How much? Good questions. I’ll see….. -Rusty
Rusty & Wolf 2019 